Book Pilgrim

Don't be a weenie.

Sun-Sep-2014
378 notes
Sun-Sep-2014
27 notes
lunaticobscurity:

denji sentai megaranger episode 9

lunaticobscurity:

denji sentai megaranger episode 9

(via cloacacarnage)

Sun-Sep-2014
826,067 notes

wurnbo:

did i allow u to have fun without me

(via tom-f0rd)

Sun-Sep-2014
29,887 notes

(Source: neilcicierega, via elfcirynn)

Sun-Sep-2014
1,526 notes

Erotica Written By An 8 Year Old Boy Who Is Still Trying To Figure Out What Sex Is

hothotphone:

image

Tom Brady was tired from all the football he had been playing. He was sweaty too. He had scored like 100 touchdowns.

Something you should know about Tom Brady is that he is the best at football. He is also the best at sex. He is the Tom Brady of sex. He definitely knows what it is and how to do it.  

As he walked off the football field , he ran into Margaret. She was the head cheerleader for the New England Patriots. She had long blonde hair, like that elf guy in the Hobbit, but better because she was a girl. Her boobs were really big, full of milk, probably.

“Hey Tom,” she said.

“Hey Margaret, you look dumb today,” he said back.

Girls like it when you are mean to them.

Margaret smiled. She liked it when Tom was mean to her.

“Thanks Tom Brady. You are so good at sports. You have won so many Superbowls,” Margaret said.  She started to walk towards him, winking both eyes.

That’s when something crazy happened: Tom Brady’s peenie got big and muscular, like Gastons muscles in that scene from Beauty and the Beast. He didn’t get it, because he still thought girls were dumb and ugly. Maybe it was because his peenie was angry.

Margaret walked towards him slowly, and she gave him the look that Nala gives Simba in that scene in the Lion King.

“Why are you looking at me like Nala does in the Lion King?” Tom Brady asked sexily.

“Because I want to sex ya,” Margaret said. “Let’s do sex. You with your peenie, and me with mine.”

“Oh girls have peenies too?” Tom asked even though he knew the answer.

“Of course we do! We have girl peenies. They’re almost the same, but a little different. Full of milk just like our boobs.”

Tom nodded.

She quickly took off her cheerleading shirt and then her bra.

Boing Boing! Her breasts fell out.

She threw her bra away like a boomerang. The bra went soaring through the air and then flew back to tom Brady’s hands like Thor’s hammer in the Avengers.

Tom Brady caught it, which means that you can have sex now.

Each big boob probably weighed 80 pounds, like a big river bass, and was white and beautiful and had a shiny nickel at the end.

“Nice nickels!” Tom Brady said.

Margaret walked up to Tom, and they kissed.

Then Tom’s peenie exploded, and that was it. Sex was over.

“Thanks so much Tom Brady for sexing with me,” said Margaret.

“Shut up ya dumb fart breath,” said Tom. “I gotta go play football.

He turned and ran for the field, but stopped before he got there.

“I love you Margaret,” he yelled back at her.

“Love you, too,” she said.

Sat-Sep-2014
25,630 notes
me @ me :
chill
Sat-Sep-2014
7 notes
Selfie eye.

Selfie eye.

Sat-Sep-2014
80,162 notes
Fri-Sep-2014
9,462 notes

India Mahdavi x David Shrigley for Sketch, London.

India Mahdavi x David Shrigley for Sketch, London.

(Source: beibadgirl, via johnsteinbeck-)

Fri-Sep-2014
9 notes
I’ve taken a lot of selfies of my own face but this one I took a little bit ago at the office is my favorite. 

I’ve taken a lot of selfies of my own face but this one I took a little bit ago at the office is my favorite. 

Fri-Sep-2014
357 notes
Thu-Sep-2014
21,671 notes
untrustyou:

Elinor Carrucci - Closer
Mother drives me in the rain. (2000)

untrustyou:

Elinor Carrucci - Closer

Mother drives me in the rain. (2000)

(via johnsteinbeck-)

Thu-Sep-2014
34 notes

(Source: roach702, via cloacacarnage)

Thu-Sep-2014
372 notes

(Source: deijee, via deijee)

Thu-Sep-2014
34,378 notes

(Source: sheisthewater, via cute-pubes)